I am surrounded by you .. to try to shut you out is like trying to shut out the sun and the wind.. tried doing that too over the last two days.. just me and my books in the dark cocoon of my room.. only got a lot of reading done but could not get you off my mind... its frustrating to realize how much of everything round me is you .. infact how much of me is infact just you .. Its futile and i have given up .. i'll lie here in decay like rose petals in sweet syrup awaiting their ruin .. I havent spoken much in the last 3 days and i almost feel like you in school .. the mind playing its own little games conjuring up its own little tricks to keep oneself entertained almost oblivous to everything around you including yourself. Its a strange vacuous feeling like being inside a hot air baloon .. its opressively hot but you can breathe and hence wont die and you are floating away and have a clear view of everything around you. Like being submerged in water..the sounds muted .. the colors tinted .. the mind sharper than ever in its consciousness . I have you all around me .. i realise i have enough of you around me to make do not for a day or two but for a lifetime .. I dont miss you as i am you.